Colleagues, co-workers, friends and familia ask me daily what did you do? How did you slim down so fast, how did you lose 40+ pounds in less than a year? Did you workout? Diet? What is it E? What’s your secret?
Mind over Matter. . .
My whole life my weight has fluctuated. I’ve never been slim, skinny or petite by Hollywood or Western media standards—looking back, I never wanted to be. Yet, from elementary through college a battle raged within me to be smaller? To be more average…eh…I’m still not sure if I ever knew what that meant, and nowaday, to be quite honest, I really don’t give a fxck! Because in reality, one can never truly be average—why? well, it’s not rocket science that each person on this green earth was created unique; thus, who could possibly be average? NO ONE! but your mindset could be stuck in average and that’s is indeed what I had to break. Twenty-seven long years deep into life, I broke my mental barricade.
From 240 – 193lbs in 10 months?
So what physically changed? Mmm…not much I will admit. Yet, I suppose enough. I say this because I get bored really, really, really quick with routines; therefore, I have to keep myself mentally engaged by switching up my day-to-day. However, in October 2015 when I first moved back to Greater Baltimore upon Frank getting our first place we and I made some decisions that I dare say were very instrumental in jumpstarting my transformation.
- Know I’m a southern fried country-woman, so eating good is something my family knows a plethora or two about, and not to mention I married into an equally blessed family of northern chefs. Eh! FATED to be THICKNESS! Nevertheless, Frank and I agreed we wanted to push toward less meat for many reasons…and so we did the unthinkable we started cutting out meats—first came beef [I was sure I’d die], but a year removed I’m still here. Then was pork, and aside from the very occasional pepperoni pizza, I would say the Universe is working behind the scenes to make this transition smoother. That left poultry, fish, and seafood—and while I’m not much for fish or seafoodie I will reach for chicken a time or two. Thus, my next big feat is conquering that craving!
- Getting up, getting out and getting active! … Uh, I hate working out. #fact. Thus, self and I have had to make a compromise and with the help of King it hasn’t been that hard. We live busy lives, so we’re constantly on the go, and we use this fact to our advantage. When it’s time to brainstorm for a new project we go walking and talking through our neighborhood, or at our local shopping center. When we’re bored in the house we grab weights or yoga mats and do a lil something-something just to get our blood pumping. I love to dance—and I love ballet so that serves as my random burst of rigorous exercise here and there. I turn on some music…any genre and just get lost in the pliés, and budding half-point pirouettes. And yeah we are all Queen’s here, so I can’t forget to mention plenty of grown folks yoga and Kamasutra sh!t ♥.
A Queen’s Way or the Highway …
In the midst of the latter life revisions, the most drastic change for me came around late May while staring at the numbers on the scale that continued to swing back and forth between 208 and 218. Regardless of Frank’s constant encouragement and his consistent “you’re losing weight”—I was frustrated. Looking in the mirror I wasn’t seeing the change I wanted because I was blinded by those iffy numerals. The sad part, I knew I was being blinded and still I chose to stress it. And then one day I said something to the extent of “fxck it, I’m going to live and not stress…I’m going keep the faith until I see the woman I want to see in this mirror.” Frank became my accountability partner, simply holding me accountable to the latter mindset…and that’s when I stopped looking at the scale regularly. I started tuning into how I felt in my clothing—those that finally fit perfect and those that had begun to drape. I began focusing on the fact that I could see my body shaping up, and the many times in one day Frank called me sexy, or his and my Madre’s suggesting “Shi-Shi don’t get too skinny”. . . Then one day a month and some days ago I woke up and I hopped on the scale and I was 205, then 198 and then 195…
And although the numbers on the scale keep doing what they do, I realized some time before the 205 pounds/92 kg mark the woman I had been dreaming of was standing in the guest bathroom mirror this entire journey, just waiting—on me to move: smiling at our future—anticipating the point in time when I would just step aside and allow Her to live and experience Her journey.